For the sake of my own mental health, I put a pause on my counselling.
I see the irony of this, don't worry.
We are born into being told what to do, how to think, how to feel.
Our societal construct revolves around others educating and advising others.
We need that support to move us forward. And up until a certain point in your life, that's pretty normal.
Except, I had gotten lazy with it.
I was waiting for a solution. I was stuck in a loop of waiting for something to change. I was repeating the same worries, concerns and frustrations and it was making me anxious. I was waiting for someone to help me and as a result, nothing happened.
You'd think by now I would recognise the signs, right? But I had grown too reliant on the support of someone else.
I was frustrated, my counselor was frustrated. I had walked away from a session feeling deflated instead of energised as normal.
I woke up and instead of feeling low and a bit sad (which had been my recent mental state), I heard myself saying 'I want things to be better'
I had forgotten how to tap in to my greatest power; taking action.
I've always been pretty proactive and it’s served me pretty well to date, (maybe a little too much sometimes if you've read my burnout posts). But I know when to switch things on and get moving.
I guess I felt a little fatigued. When you are running your own business or have your teeth into a project, it feels like you're always running, and it can get a little tiring. If you can delegate to others, then it's nice to take a load off. And hey, looks like that's exactly what I did.
But it's not up to my counselor to move myself forward.
"You either need to accept your reality… or change it", she said to me (again)
Not accepting or changing your reality can cause a lot of wasted time. Being a non-EU whilst living in the EU, post Brexit without a permanent job contract or regular income has left me feeling rejected, discriminated against and a bit hopeless.
It's a tough pill to swallow.
But there are aspects to this that I CAN change. And the only thing I can do here is to take action against that instead of languishing in the injustice of it and wasting everyone's time.
Who can best serve me when it comes to taking action? Coaches.
I need plans, action lists, options and the right mindset.
So in the meantime, I turn the volume down on counseling and turn it up to 11 for coaching, because it's time to make sh*t happen.
And we can all watch the effects of that in the next month….. I haven't done anything yet, but I know for sure I will.
Because I'm in control of this.
What are YOU in control of?
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